Young Man and Family

A young man goes into a pharmacy and says to the pharmacist, 'Hello, could   you give me condom. I'm going to my girlfriends for dinner and I think I may be in with a chance!'
The pharmacist gives him the condom and as the young man is going out; he returns and says, 'Give me another condom because my girlfriend's sister is very cute too. She always crosses her legs in a provocative manner when she sees me and I think I might strike it lucky there too..'
The pharmacist gives him a second condom and as the boy is leaving he turns back and says, 'Go on, give me one more condom because my girlfriend's mum is still pretty cute and when she sees me she always makes eyes, and since she invited me for dinner, I think she is expecting me to make a move!

During dinner, the young man is sitting with his girlfriend on his left, the sister on his right and the mum facing him. When the dad gets there,  the boy lowers his head and starts praying,  'Dear Lord, bless this dinner and thank you for all you give us'. A minute later the boy is still praying;
'Thank you Lord for your kindness.'  
Ten minutes go by and the boy is still praying, keeping his head down. The others look at each other surprised and his girlfriend is even more surprised than the others.
She gets close to the boy and says in his ear, 'I didn't know you were so religious.' The boy replies, 'I didn't know your dad was a pharmacist!'

Three Friends

There were three fast friends...a Pandit, a Baniya and a Jaat. Teenon
ke sab kuchh saath saath hi hua -- schooling, college, yahan tak ki
shaadi bhi -- halanki hui alag alag ladkiyon se. Teenon honeymoon bhi
saath saath hi gaye...aur ek hi hotel main stay karenge. So, hotel
main pahunchane ke baad, teenon apne rooms main jaane se pahle mile
aur decide kiya ki subah ko breakfast table par ek doosre ko batayenge
ki kisne kitni baar kiya. Par samasya thi ki apni patniyon ke saamne
kaise is bare main baat karenge. Par teenon bahut smart the, jaldi hi
solution bhi dhoondh liya, ki jo jitne baar bread par butter lagayega
to uska matlab hoga ki usne utni baar sex kiya. Aur teenon apne apne
room main chale gaye.
Subah teenon mile...breakfast table par...teenon ki wives bhi thi. To
pahle Pandit ne apni bread uthai, aur butter lagaya...ek baar...do
baar... aur wapas plate main rakh di. Phir Baniye ne apni bread
uthai... butter lagaya... ek baar... do baar... phir bread ko palta...
phir butter lagaya... ek ... do. Matlab, do baar donon taraf se
thoka... Ab baari thi Jaat ki. Usne apni bread uthai...butter
lagaya... ek ... do baar ... use palta ... ek baar butter lagaya ...
do baar ... Phir Pandit ki bread uthai... donon taraf butter lagaya
aur rakh di ... phir baniye ki bread uthai ... aur use bhi donon taraf
butter laga diya ...
Aur dosti khatam...

Divorce???

A Newly Married Couple Seeking Divorce...
Judge asks Lady "Why do you want divorce?"
Lady: Despite Knowin That I'm Vegetarian, He Forces Ne To Put Meat In My Mouth!!"

Pandit Pita-Puttar

EK BAAR EK PANDIT JI KE LADKE KI SHAADI HUI.
SUHAGRAAT KO WO BECHARA THODA CONFUSE HO GAYA.
USNE APNE PITA JI KO AWAAJ LAGAYI AUR PUCHA
BETA- PITASHRI,

TRI CHIDRAM MUM PASHYAMI, KIM CHIDRAM FUCKUM FUCKAMI

PITA-  PUTRA,

GOL KUNDUM MAHA PAAPAM,TRIBHUJAKARU M FUKUM FUKAMI

Munna-Munni Duet

Munni woh din yaad karo
jab hum tum sath nahate the,
tum chut pe sabun malti thi ,
hum land pe jhag udate the.

Munna woh din beet gaye ,
jab hum tum sath nahate the,
ab chut chupane ki bari hai,
munni bharat ki nari hai.

Munni woh din yaad karo
jab hum tum sath sote the,
tum chut mein kheti karti thi ,
hum land pe ganne bote the.

Munna woh din beet gaye ,
jab chut mein kheti hoti thi,
ab land ki fusslo ki khatir,
humne ise banjar bana diya.

Munni woh din yaad karo
jab luka chipi khelte the,
tum lahanga pahan kar aati thi,
aur hum usme chup jate the.
Munna woh din beet gaye,
jab hamne tumhe chupaya tha,
ab tum to jaat ke bhalu ho,
lahange me shahad ka chhatta hai.

Munni woh din yaad karo,
jab sath deewali khele the,
tum chut pe tikli rakhti thi ,
hum land se foda karte the.
Munna woh din beet gaye,
jab chut pe tikli fodi thi.
ab chut hamari pyari hai,
aur loda tera bhikhari hai.

Munni woh din beet gaye
han munni woh din beet gaye.
ab chut ke darshan ki khatir ,
hum chut chalisa padhte hai,
par chut nahi darshan deti,
hum land se ladte rahte hai.
par waqt hamara aayega.
jab hum bhi tum ko chodenge,
tum land land chillaogi
hum chut me danda pelenge.
munni munne ko kam na samajh
yeh teri phudi chodega..
tu pair pakad kar royegi..
teri chut me keeel(nails) thokega